The Observer’s Guide to Grief: The Calendar

Now that you have become
A Person Who Has Experienced Bereavement
(P.W.H.E.B)
You will probably have already noticed
How the calendar
Is no longer full of good things
For you to look forward to.
You will have seen the icebergs
Dead Ahead
That nothing you can do will avoid.
You will smash into them many times
On the journey that lies before you
And they will threaten to capsize
Your fragile, lonely boat.

Since no amount of ignorance
Can make for any difference
To the inevitability of their impact
The advice of this author is to welcome them
By celebrating the date
As wholeheartedly as ever you would have done
Before your world sank.

Some who have travelled this way before
Report that it gets easier
With time
I hope they’re right
But just in case
Wrap up warm
And find the joy
In the date you fear
You will never have to face it
For the very first time
Again.

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This poem is the fourth in a series I’ve been writing since the death of my mother earlier this year.